The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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Albert Einstein was a genius but

My wife just accused me of having zero empathy.

Just found out that Aaaargghhh is not a real word.

Today I learned that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.....

People say that I am self-centred

I wrote a sequel to the movie "Airplane"

What did Tennessee?

My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.

I dropped an egg onto a concrete floor and it didn't break.


Don't be worried about your smartphone or TV spying on you.

I was fired from a bank.

My friend told me he was Jewish.

What did the vegetarian say to the doctor?

I clean all my weapons with tree sap.

Why was dumbo sad?