The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

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My clock broke.

Previous Dates

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Irony.

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Why was the math teacher late to work?

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An old lady in bank asked me if I can check her balance

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Why was the cow so aggressive?

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Asked My Date To Meet Me At The Gym, But She Never Showed Up...

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I saw my nephew after a long time, and said “Wow! You must have grown a foot since I saw you last!”

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What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?

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What do I do if I need some info about Alaska?

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My doctor friend is addicted to hitting his patients on their knees to check their reflexes.

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I was going to tell the story about my broken pencil.

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Why don't English rugby players get vaccinated before touring?

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I had a Wookie burger at a Star Wars cafe

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Whenever I see a school bus, I think about my uncles last words...

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What's the difference between a guitar, a fish, and glue?

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Why did the golfer change his pants?

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I'm a 50-year old with the body of a 35-year old

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Why is honey good for you?

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When I was a single man, I had a lot of free time.

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If you had a bisexual son, wouldn't he just be called a...

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I changed my iPod name to Titanic.

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On the anniversary of his birth, devotees of a certain yogi asked what gifts they might bring.

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My friend claims that he “accidentally” glued himself to his autobiography, but I don’t believe him.

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Ladies, if your boyfriend asks for matador equipment for christmas...

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What do you call a bee trying to make up its mind?

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My wife and I share the same sense of humour.

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I think i might be addicted to dough,

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I have joke about left-handers.

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Why is the ocean salty?

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What do you call a tea that looks really good?

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Dad : “I need to call the doctor today.” Mom : “Which doctor?”

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I connot belive that bacteria would just come in my body without my permision