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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
copilot: they keep your shirt closed
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You know what actually makes me smile?
My Facial muscles
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What kind of murder has fiber?
A Cereal Killer
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My girlfriend poked me in the eyes...
...so I stopped seeing her for a little while.
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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