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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
copilot: they keep your shirt closed
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Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?
He was too far out, man.
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I quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big or strong enough.
Today, I put in my too-weak notice.
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I call my horse Mayo,
and sometimes Mayo Neighs.
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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