The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

0

What did the sushi say to the bee?

Previous Dates

0

I used to get heartburn whenever I ate birthday cake...

0

To the person who stole my glasses

0

Social distancing has led to Hooters offering delivery to your door.

0

What do you call a group of whales playing instruments?

2

Why did Mickey Mouse become an astronaut?

0

My battery died when I was recording my wife giving a toast at her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.

1

“Dad, is the Fibonacci sequence hard to understand?”

0

Did you know that Iceland...

1

I have been diagnosed with a type of amnesia where I can't remember 80's bands.

0

Why was the cow so aggressive?

0

What kind of tea do hockey players drink?

0

I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth, we can read maps backwards!" and I thought...

0

Why did the female mushroom ask the male mushroom on a date?

0

What’s the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

0

If spaghetti made an action movie, what would it be called?

0

One potato looks to another potato and says "Are you a sweet potato?"

0

My wife just threw away my favourite herb.

0

How do you split the ocean in half?

0

What did the hockey goalie say to his teammates?

0

What does Dr. Jekyll do first thing every morning?

0

[Interview] “It says here on your resume that you used to be in the theatre. What made you leave?”

0

So I texted my crush and asked her, “Are you an ancient artifact,”

8

How does a computer get drunk?

0

Today I launched a book aimed at 9-12 year olds.

0

I used to work at a calendar factory,

0

Here's one...

0

How does a penguin build a house?

0

I asked my dad for his best dad joke and he said,

0

What do you call a woman who sounds like an ambulance?

0

What do you call someone who gets mad when they don't have any bread?

0

I just spent $300 for a limousine and found out it doesnt come with a driver.