The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

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I gave a PS5 to my girlfriend..

Previous Dates

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Why didn’t the melons get married?

1

How does the Earth keep itself clean?

6

I stole my ex girlfriend’s wheelchair

0

Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

0

A man standing on a riverbank yells to a woman on the other side, "Hey, how do I get to the other side of the river?"

0

How did the farmer mend the holes in his jeans?

0

What is it called when one butt cheek is bigger than the other?

0

How do ponies communicate with each other?

0

What’s blue and not heavy

1

Since i have COVID people tell me i enjoy bad music and movies

0

My boss hates when I shorten his name to Dick.

1

Did you hear about the Giant that threw up?

0

Why can't a father teach his girl about buying bras?

0

When I was born I was so surprised,

1

What superhero gets hurt the easiest?

1

You know there's no official training for garbagemen?

0

What is it called when one butt cheek is bigger than the other?

1

Bro, do you want this pamphlet?

0

I wrote down the names of everyone I hate a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll a joint.

1

Mary had a little lamb.

0

What do you call a short mexican?

0

Pride is what you feel when your kids net $100 from a garage sale.

0

My battery died when I was recording my wife giving a toast at her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.

0

What do you call an apology sent via Morse Code?

0

What jokes are allowed during lockdown?

2

Feminine hygiene jokes are the lowest form of humor.

0

What language do geese speak?

0

Why do 9 ants get to live in an apartment for free?

0

Why did the dad tell the joke

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Have you heard the joke about the bed?

0

You can tell the gender of any animal by just throwing a pebble at it.