The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

0

I gave a PS5 to my girlfriend..

Previous Dates

6

There is a cult where they don’t believe in using coins.

0

Can't imagine someone not understanding what erectile dysfunction is

0

What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket?

0

Why didn't the dad shower before telling his joke?

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I quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big or strong enough.

0

Got fired from the sperm bank yesterday

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What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

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How does Moses make coffee?

1

How do celebrities stay cool?

0

Stopped by a roadside stand that said lobster tails $2. I paid my $2 and he said...

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Justice is a dish best served cold,

-1

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused novocaine during his root canal?

0

When an Amazon employee takes maternity leave

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What Do You Call A Cheap Circumcision?

1

I was reading the history of the French Revolution, and just found out what happened to Louis XVI ‘s head.

2

How do short people cut their pizza?

0

My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but wasn’t awarded a gold medal.

0

I was talking to a rancher today. I said, “I have 54 sheep. Can you round them up for me?”

1

I have been diagnosed with a type of amnesia where I can't remember 80's bands.

0

What begins with “f” and ends in “uck”

0

I’ve got a phobia of over-engineered buildings.

0

I met some aliens from outer space.

0

Wanna hear a dirty joke?

0

Being a cardiac surgeon...

1

Before he passed away, my grandfather said, “Here are three words that would help open a lot of doors for you.”

0

My wife yelled at me, telling me to put the toilet seat down..

0

Why can't you play basketball with pigs?

0

What do you call an ugly dinosaur?

0

I'm going to have my spine removed

2

There are three signs of old age. The first is memory loss.

0

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?