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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Before he passed away, my grandfather said, “Here are three words that would help open a lot of doors for you.”
Push and Pull.
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I'd like to start dieting...
...but I just have too much on my plate right now.
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I have a friend who really loves to count.
I wonder what he’s up to?
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I saw my nephew after a long time, and said “Wow! You must have grown a foot since I saw you last!”
He said, “No. I still have two.”
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A captain harpooned a whale's tail on his first throw.
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