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Got fired from the sperm bank yesterday
Apparently you’re not allowed to nudge the nearest co-worker and say “get a load of this guy” every time someone walks in.
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Why is no one friends with Dracula?
Because he's a pain in the neck.
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A bald head is just like Heaven
There's no dyeing or parting there
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change it, and five to sing about how good the old one was.
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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