The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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1

What is Santa’s religion?

1

What do you call a bunch of chess nerds bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?

1

I ordered some stuff online yesterday and I used my Donor Card instead of my Debit Card.

2

Husband: Help! My wife is going into labor! 911 Operator: Is this her first child?

1

My father was born as a conjoined twin, but the doctors managed to separate them at birth.

0

I dropped an egg onto a concrete floor and it didn't break.

1

Why can't blind people eat ocean fish?

3

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?

1

Did you hear about the new dating website for chemists?

-1

What is the opposite of ladyfingers?