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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
Todays Joke
0
Why don't English rugby players get vaccinated before touring?
They never catch anything.
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Previous Dates
0
What is black and white and sits on a swing?
A swinguine.
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0
What is white, stands in front of the stairs, and can’t go up?
A washing machine.
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0
What type of people never get angry?
The nomads.
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0
What do ducks smoke?
Quack.
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0
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9!
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0
My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine.
I added some fruit and orange juice—now she’s sangria than ever.
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0
I don’t know why people have a problem with wigs.
It’s a look anybody can pull off!
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1
I’m terrified of elevators…
… so I’m going to start taking steps to avoid them.
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1
My deaf wife just told me that “we need to talk.”
That was not a good sign.
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0
Keep the Earth clean.
It isn't Uranus.
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1
Why is the letter "C" afraid of the rest of the alphabet?
Because all the other letters are Not-Cs
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9
I saw my wife, slightly drunk, yelling at the TV: “Don’t go in there! Don’t go in the church, you moron!”
She is watching our wedding video again.
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6
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator.
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6
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator.
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9
I saw my wife, slightly drunk, yelling at the TV: “Don’t go in there! Don’t go in the church, you moron!”
She is watching our wedding video again.
REVEAL ANSWER
6
I got the words “jacuzzi” and “yakuza” confused.
Now I’m in hot water with the Japanese mafia.
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Why don't English rugby players get vaccinated before touring?
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