The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

1

My wife and I share the same sense of humour.

Previous Dates

0

I'm taking part in a stair climbing competition.

0

After all these years, my wife still thinks I’m sexy.

0

What does the clock do when it's hungry?

0

What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket?

1

I keep asking iris why some people have dyslexia, but she won't answer.

0

Which day do eggs hate?

0

2020 can’t end

0

My cat gained so much weight that I had to put her down

0

How did the farmer mend the holes in his jeans?

0

Knock-knock! Who's there? Candy. Candy who?

8

How does a computer get drunk?

0

Ebay is useless. I tried searching for lighters

0

I don’t know why people have a problem with wigs.

0

I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.

0

Broken guitar for sale.

1

If you rearrange the letters of “Postmen”

0

This one time, all the rooms in a hotel were booked. But then comes this one guy, who asks for a room, in the same hotel, and gets one easily.

0

Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?

2

Husband: Help! My wife is going into labor! 911 Operator: Is this her first child?

0

Why is no one friends with Dracula?

0

I lost my memory after getting hit on the head by a boomerang.

0

I got a job as a human cannonball.

0

What does Pac-Man eat with his chips?

0

I gave a PS5 to my girlfriend..

0

“Dad, can you call mom’s phone? She can’t find it.”

2

I told my suitcases just now there will be no holiday this year.

0

My flat-earther friend started walking to the edge of the earth to prove that the earth is flat.

0

Spring is here but I can't plant flowers yet...

0

Who won the skeleton fitness contest?

1

My dentist says I don't brush enough but hey-

0

What do you call a tea that looks really good?