The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

0

What do Spanish clocks say?

Previous Dates

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I knew I shouldn't have had the sea food.

0

Where did Sally go during the bombing?

5

Do you wanna know why skeletons are so calm?

0

I've been waiting all year to write this

1

How do bees get to school?

2

Someone stole the toilet seat at the police station.

0

Just so everybody's clear,

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Doctor: I'm sorry sir, but you have colon cancer...

-3

Instead of 'Happy New Year' I said 'good year' to my wife.

-1

I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey.

0

Incorrectly is always spelled incorrectly

0

Kid: There's something in my shoe?

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My wife convinced me to have reversed roles during sex last time...

0

Why was Pavlov’s hair so soft?

7

I had to fire the guy I hired to mow my lawn.

3

What does Jeff Bezos do every night before bed?

0

Why did the female mushroom ask the male mushroom on a date?

0

If organ trafficking is illegal,

0

Alligators can grow up to 13 feet.

0

How is Christmas like another day at the office?

0

What did the grape do when he got stepped on?

0

What are the four worst words you can hear on a golf course?

0

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you.

3

A guide on how to fall down the stairs:

6

Dad: what do you do when you are in the wrong seat?

0

What did the bystander say to the abusive farmer?

0

What do thieves make their weapons from?

0

So excited for autopsy club!

0

You have to act quickly during a flood.

1

Why did the can-crusher quit his job?

0

Two atoms are walking down the street and bump into each other