The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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6

If you become seriously depressed, try drinking a gallon of water just before you go to bed.

6

What do you call a teenager who never grows up?

4

My wife told me that my botanical garden was so expensive that it was preventing us from starting a family. She said I can either have a hobby...

-4

There's a snow storm warning for NY, including Wall Street.

12

My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.

6

Dad: what do you do when you are in the wrong seat?

17

Why did the bullet end up losing his job?

8

The school phoned me today and said, "Your son's has been telling lies. "

19

My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list...

3

Guys, I have been thinking about selling my Theremin.