The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

0

When I was young, my dad used to tear up the last page of all my comic books and never told me why.

Previous Dates

0

I used to work at a calendar factory,

0

I don't really care about Mr. Cone's opinion

0

Shredded cheese was a great invention.

0

How did Jesus get so strong?

0

At the end of the day...

0

Americans can't switch from pounds to kilograms overnight.

0

Why did the female mushroom ask the male mushroom on a date?

0

A captain harpooned a whale's tail on his first throw.

0

My biology teacher asked "What's heavier, the Indian or African elephant?"

0

Who is a dog's favorite comedian?

0

What is a frog's favorite drink?

0

A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines. So I called the cops.

0

I felt pretty sick after drinking milk with cream.

0

What does Superman have in his drink?

0

Two atoms are walking down the street and bump into each other

0

How many apples grow on a tree?

0

Here's a good circumcision joke.

0

I took my wife to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you, but she wasn't very happy.

1

Dogs can't see your bones.

2

What I if told you

0

My biology teacher asked "What's heavier, the Indian or African elephant?"

0

How tall is a spider?

0

What makes more noise than a T-rex?

0

Frequent nap taking slows the aging process.

0

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too High

0

What did the vegetarian say to the doctor?

0

What is cold and stands under a street lamp?

0

People who rob jewelry stores and banks are pretty bad.

0

Toy story 4 used to have a scene where Woody's friends died.

0

My son thinks he’s smart, he said onions are the only food that makes you cry.

5

What do you call someone with no body and no nose?