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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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2750 Results
1
I was reading the history of the French Revolution, and just found out what happened to Louis XVI ‘s head.
[removed]
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1
My therapist says that I second guess every decision that I ever make.
[deleted]
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-1
My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
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0
My dad always said, “ Find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and try to convince her to marry you.”
“She knows how to make bad decisions and stick by them.”
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2
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin
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2
3 unwritten rules of life...
1. 2. 3.
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0
I remember asking my dad repeatedly what the acronym LGBTQ meant.
I never got a straight answer.
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2
I just found out that “Aaarghh” is not a real word.
I can’t express how angry that makes me.
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0
A vegan said to me, “People who sell meat are disgusting!”
I said, “People who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.”
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0
My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
I replied, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine."
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My friend David just lost his ID.
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