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A vegan said to me, “People who sell meat are disgusting!”
I said, “People who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.”
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People told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic
But so far I've made 3 jugs and a vase and they turned out lovely
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Genie: What's your first wish master? John: I wish I was rich.
Genie: Done! What's your second wish Rich?
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Step 1: Name your dog 5 miles.
Step 2: Brag that you walk 5 miles every day
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I asked my wife if I’m the only one she had ever slept with.
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