The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

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When I was young, my dad used to tear up the last page of all my comic books and never told me why.

Previous Dates

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Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells?

-1

My teacher told me I would never be any good at Poetry because of my dyslexia....

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What do you call a short mexican?

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A photon checks into a hotel, and the bellhop says, "Can I get your bags for you?"

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I love going outdoors...

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I can’t believe that even after 15 years of the show ending, people are still making “Friends” references.

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Puns leave me numb.

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Soccer striker: I had an open goal but still I didn't score. I could kick myself.

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Why couldn't the astronaut land on the moon?

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Why did the wolf meditate?

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A man I know brings cheese from home to put on his fast food burgers instead of paying extra.

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What's the difference between a baseball hitter and a skydiver?

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Did you hear about the twins who got an apartment together?

3

If I had to rate our solar system

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What does Pac-Man eat with his chips?

0

Dad to his daughter: "Never forget, sweetie, you're unique,

1

I can't stand stair lifts.

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Kid: Dad, can you teach me how to play chess?

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How do billboards communicate?

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My girlfriend just asked me what state was below Tennessee...

0

Narnia was a really progressive film

0

As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden.

3

A man came up to me and said "Man, your clothes look gay".

0

Dads are like boomerangs

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Why did the mexican gang fail?

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What did the unborn twins say when they were hungry?

0

What type of people never get angry?

0

My friend bit off his tongue.

1

What's it called when a chameleon can't change color?

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I've started investing in stocks...

0

I had to give up on my idea to create a miniature flamethrower