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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
5
Whycan’tastronaughtsgetdrunk?
...becausethere’snospacebar.
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4
Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
But it was a false Salaam.
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2
Why don't the Jedi take off their shirts to greet each other?
Because only a Sith deals in ab salutes.
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2
Saw a werewolf at the bus stop this morning, or possibly just a very hairy guy.
Either way, the silver bullets worked.
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2
I gots two words that will leave you all scratching your heads.
Head lice.
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2
My wife came back from the store complaining about how the lady at the register was a total bitch.
I asked her if she was at self check out. Looks like I'm sleeping on the couch.
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3
I have a friend who writes songs about sewing machines.
He's a Singer songwriter, or sew it seams.
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If you upload 1000 pictures on Instagram..
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