We're opening a gym called Resolutions. It will have exercise equipment for the first two weeks of the year
and then turn into a bar for the rest of it.
When people ask me if I exercise, I tell them I do crunches every day.
Cap'n Crunch, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Nestle Crunch...
Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a deck of cards!
Psychiatrist: Sit over there. I'll deal with you later!