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What's the difference between sanitizer and moisturizer?
One will burn your eyes, the other will moisturize.
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Where would you find a tortoise with no legs?
Wherever you left it.
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I lost my memory after getting hit on the head by a boomerang.
It's all coming back to me now.
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When I got to work this morning, my boss stormed up to me and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"
I said, "No, not particularly."
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I went to the beekeeper to get 12 bees. He counted and gave me 13. "Sir, you gave me an extra."
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