The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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My dad always told me there were two rules to be successful in any business.

1

If H20 is in the inside of a fire hydrant, what's on the outside ?

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My wife asked me if I could clear the kitchen table.

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What’s the difference between bird flu and swine flu?

2

Who lives in a house with one bedroom, 50 hallways, and ghosts lurking everywhere?

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Dad: when I was your age I ran a maratho. Son: you mean marathon.

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What do you get when you cross the Atlantic on the Titanic?