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What color do cats like best?
Purrrrple.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
I replied, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine."
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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?
He rasped, "Cuz they’re still alive!"
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Today we tried teaching my six month old son how to hold things.
But he wasn’t grasping the concept.
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I think my favorite part of going to the gym
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