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Reporter: How do you motivate your employees to be so punctual?
Company owner: It's simple. I have 100 employees, and 99 free parking spaces outside. The other one costs $50 a day.
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Dad: Why is your January report card so bad?
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As my Dad used to say, “when one door closes, another one opens.”
Lovely man, lousy cabinet maker though.
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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