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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I'm a parent, so I'm always right. There was one time I thought I was wrong.
But as it turns out, I was wrong.
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Being a great father is like shaving.
No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again tomorrow.
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What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One's a pop fly. The other's a fly pop.
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Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can't come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.
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What do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is?
A widow.
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I asked my wife to pick up a pumpkin to make pumpkin pie. When she said she couldn't find one at the store, I told her,
"I guess our plans are squashed."
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I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated,
so they can get into a good college that we can't afford.
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Parallel lines have so much in common.
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