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"I can see for miles,"
said Miles' guide dog.
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How many bodybuilders does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three. One to do it and two to tell him, "You're looking huge man, you're looking huge!"
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What is the least spoken language in the world?
Sign language
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My wife asked me if she could have some peace and quiet while she tried to cook dinner.
So i took the batteries out of the smoke alarm
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Wife: What are you doing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.
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