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I wrote down the names of everyone I hate on a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll his joint.
He’s now high on the list of people I never want to see again.
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What did the banana do when it saw a horde of hungry monkeys?
Split!
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Me: Know what Thanos says when he finds a rotten fruit in his garden? My kids: Ugh.
"It is... Inedible"
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Why does Peter pan always fly?
Because he neverlands!
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What bug did dinosaurs hate the most?
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