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I wrote down the names of everyone I hate on a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll his joint.
He’s now high on the list of people I never want to see again.
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What concert only costs $0.45?
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My daughter was playing with my computer and she broke the R button and tried to eat it.
She craves anarchy.
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My neighbor blamed my gravel for making him fall…
But it was his dumb asphalt…
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What do you call a nose with no body?
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