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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson…
He said, “But dad, your name is Brian.” I said, “I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”
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Who writes nursery rhymes and squeezes oranges?
Mother Juice.
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I have a friend with no social skills and a Ph.D in the history of palindromes.
I call him Dr. Awkward.
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Knock-knock! Who's there? Yoda. Yoda who?
Yoda one who's supposed to do the dishes.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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