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Whenever the cashier at the grocery store asks my dad if he would like the milk in a bag he replies,
"No, just leave it in the carton! "
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My dad burst into my room and said, “Wanna hear a joke?”, and then proceeded to fart for a whole minute.
He said. “Sorry. That was a long winded story.”
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Where do you find a dog with no legs?
The same place they left him.
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Why don’t vampires go to barbecues?
They don’t like steak.
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I gave all my dead batteries away today…
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