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Whenever I see a school bus, I think about my uncles last words...
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Did you know trees can do math?
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?
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I entered my sons room and said, "Remember, boy, masturbating can make you go blind."
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I went to the beekeeper to get 12 bees. He counted and gave me 13. "Sir, you gave me an extra."

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