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What kind of exercise is perfect for lazy people?
Diddly squats!
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What do you call a bunch of chess nerds bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.
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My wife asked me, “Are you sometimes surprised as to how little people change?”
I said, “Actually, the process is the same. Apart from their tiny clothes.”
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My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.
The decision was a piece of cake.
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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