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Caller: Operator! Call me an ambulance!
Operator: Okay, you're an ambulance!
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"Welcome back, everybody" is apparently not a good way to start your speech
if you're the best man at your buddy's second wedding.
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How do you know if a potato had a great day?
When it's peeling good.
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I entered a horse themed costume contest dressed up as an elephant
I won despite the many neigh sayers
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One impeachment is bad, but two impeachments.
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