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What does the clock do when it's hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
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I once dated a girl in ISIS
She was the bomb
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Dad, did you get a haircut?
No, I got them all cut.
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My friend was fired from a road construction job for theft.
I didn't believe it, but when I went over to his house, all the signs were there.
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Jack: How’s it going? Beans: Pretty good
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