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A man is washing his car with his son. The son asks,
"Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"
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What happened when the dog ate the firefly?
It barked with de-light!
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Don’t stare at a glass of water.
Take a pitcher it’ll last longer.
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I wrote down the names of everyone I hate a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll a joint.
He's now high on the list of people I don't want to see again.
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Why are skeletons so calm?
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