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What do cigarettes and squirrels have in common?
They're both perfectly safe until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
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I have a fear of speed bumps.
I'm slowly getting over it.
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My kid’s pet rabbit named Gotye ran away a few days ago, and we can’t find it.
Now he’s just some bunny we used to know.
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My interviewer asked if I could preform under pressure.
I said no, but I can do a good Bohemian Rhapsody
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What do you call a nose with no body?
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