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Today I learned that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.....
And I gotta say that's true because I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey
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I get depressed if I don’t play video games.
I always need to console myself.
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I gave my daughter a watch for her birthday. She thought it was so cool and when she showed it to the next door neighbor, he asked, "That's a pretty watch you've got there! Does it tell you the time?"
She laughed and said, "No, this is an old-fashioned watch! You have to look at it!"
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What happened to the man who took the airline company to court after his luggage went missing?
He lost his case.
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What do you call a piece of wood with nothing to do?
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