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Student: Why are we dissecting mushrooms?
Teacher: Because studying fungus is a cultured way to mold young minds.
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What do you call a blender that made a mistake?
Blunder
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Has anyone been to Engagement, Ohio ?
It's a little place between Dayton and Marion.
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Why should you never date an apostrophe?
They're too possessive!
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I gave all my dead batteries away today…
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