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Scientists record the sound of two helium atoms laughing.
HeHe
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“Dear Diary, I think I have trouble distinguishing between inanimate objects and human beings.”
My therapist: Yes, I see that. Stop calling me Diary.
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My wife tried to unlatch our daughter's car seat with one hand and said, "How do one armed mothers do it?"
Without missing a beat I replied, "Single handedly."
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Won my first cage fight today…
the bird didn’t know what hit him.
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Why does the man want to buy nine rackets?
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