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Newscaster: Why did you relocate across the country?
Weatherman: Because the weather didn't agree with me.
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My friend gave birth in the car on the way to the hospital
Her husband named the kid Carson
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Did you hear about the guy who dipped his testicles in glitter?
Pretty nuts!
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Once a man assaulted me with milk, butter, and cheese.
How dairy.
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What do you get when you cross the Atlantic on the Titanic?
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