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My son was crying today because he spilled his scrambled eggs all over his art supplies.
He was having an eggs and stencils crisis.
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My wife asked for a divorce today, saying I was too un-American.
I saw it coming from a kilometer away.
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My daughter thinks I don't give her enough privacy.
At least that's what she said in her diary.
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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose
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Can I watch the TV?
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