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Why did the squirrel swim on it’s back?
To keep it’s nuts dry.
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My wife came back from the store complaining about how the lady at the register was a total bitch.
I asked her if she was at self check out. Looks like I'm sleeping on the couch.
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My wife asked me if she could have some peace and quiet while she tried to cook dinner.
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My wife and I lost 100 lbs combined!
She lost 120 lbs. I gained 20.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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