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What's the best kind of booze if you want to dance all night long?
Wild Twerky
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The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.”
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
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At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, “What exactly happened before The Big Bang?”
He said, “Sorry. No time.”
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The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve.
It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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