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What does a turtle do on their birthday?
They shellabrate
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Two guys are on a boat with 3 cigarettes and nothing to light them with.
They threw one over board and the boat is now a cigarette lighter.
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My friend said, “You have a BA, Masters and a Ph.D., but you still act like an idiot.”
It was a third degree burn.
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What did the bucket with the hole in it say to the brand new bucket?
“I’m not fillin well.”
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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