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When you go to bed you may be American
But when you wake up late for work you’re Russian!
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I think my wife is leaving me because of my obsession with simplifying fractions.
Oh well, hind sight is 1.
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My friend told me, “Your wife and daughter look like twins!”
I said, “Well, they were separated at birth.”
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Welcome to plastic surgery addicts anonymous.
I see a few new faces here this week and I must say I am very disappointed.
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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