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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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I ordered two large fries
and instead they just gave me a whole bunch of tiny little ones. This is bullshit.
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How do you break up a fight between two blind men?
Yell “My money’s on the one with the knife!”
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2
No matter where I go, I like to bring my ukulele, then, whenever someone asks if I play an instrument, I say...
“I play a little guitar!"
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An apple, a banana, and an orange were on the high dive. Only the banana wouldn't jump. Why?
Because it was yellow.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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