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I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.
Turns out, they’re all bark and no bite.
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I saw my wife, slightly drunk, yelling at the TV: “Don’t go in there! Don’t go in the church, you moron!”
She is watching our wedding video again.
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My wife just yelled at me, "You haven't listened to a single word I've said"
I thought that was a pretty odd way to start a conversation
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I once gave my husband the silent treatment for an entire week, at the end of which he declared,
"Hey, we've been getting along great lately!'
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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