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Interviewer: We only hire people who are responsible.
Well, your search ends today. At my previous job, whenever something went wrong, everybody said I was responsible.
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Jeff, a semi colon, and an Oxford comma walk into a bar.
They both have a great time.
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A hamburger walks into a bar and orders a beer.
Bartender: I'm sorry, we don't serve food here.
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Do you know why stealing is illegal?
Because they bandit
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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