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I finally got my dream job at the guillotine factory
I’ll beheading there shortly
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I'll never forget the last thing that Grandpa said before he kicked the bucket:
"Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
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My therapist just told me that I have serious trouble verbalizing my emotions.
Can’t say I’m surprised.
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Why did the coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter back.
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Wife: What are you doing? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.
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