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How does the Moon cut his hair when the Sun gets in the way?
Eclipse it.
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What do prisoners use to call each other?
Cell phones.
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Four years ago today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. Today, I asked her to marry me.
She said no both times.
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If cardboard had a favorite sport, what would it be?
Boxing
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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