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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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How do you steal a coat?
You jacket.
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My son was crying today because he spilled his scrambled eggs all over his art supplies.
He was having an eggs and stencils crisis.
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A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night
Oof
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I wrote down the names of everyone I hate on a piece of paper, and my roommate used that to roll his joint.
He’s now high on the list of people I never want to see again.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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