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I'm very suspicious that someone in my family has been secretly adding glue to my weapons collection...
Everyone denies it, but I’m sticking to my guns...
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Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
But it was a false Salaam.
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I dated a twin once...
I once dated a twin. My friend asked me how I told them apart. I said Stacy has a beauty mark on her right cheek. And Frank has a beard.
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My wife told me to stop eating Christmas leftovers out the fridge
But I just can’t quit cold turkey
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What bug did dinosaurs hate the most?
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