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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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If you have diarrhea,
you've got to get your shit together.
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I played my dad in chess yesterday.
He didn't think he would win, but he just wanted to check.
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I took the shell of my racing snail, thinking it would help him run faster.
If anything, it made him more sluggish.
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My wife asked me, “Do you think our kids are spoiled?”
I said, “No. Most of them smell that way.”
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What is hairy, brown, and goes up and down?
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